


Alles Liebe, Dein Freund

by tinylilremus



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Books as Flirtation, F/M, Mutual Pining, Secret Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-05
Updated: 2019-05-05
Packaged: 2020-02-26 19:03:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18723085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinylilremus/pseuds/tinylilremus
Summary: Caleb isn't sure who keeps mysteriously planting books amongst his possessions, but he has his hopes for who he'd like them to be from.There's no way she feels that way about him though... is there?





	Alles Liebe, Dein Freund

It starts with a book under his pillow.

As Caleb has always had an excellent memory, he would have remembered placing a book there, so the situation strikes him as curious. Indeed, it becomes a deal more curious when he scans the title of the book ( _Fauna and Flora of the Fey Wild: an Overview_ ) and realises it’s not one from his growing collection. Slightly disconcerted, he casts a quick spell to see whether or not it has any magical essence, but as far as he can tell, it’s just a book.

A new book that has mysteriously appeared in his locked room.

Still, never one to look an apparently safe gift-horse in the mouth, Caleb immediately picks it up and begins thumbing through it. It’s been ages since he’s had anything new to read, and the book is wonderfully diverting – just page after page describing the most fantastical and interesting creatures and plants. He’s still busy with it hours later when Nott comes in to call him for dinner, and though he’s trying to get better at participating in conversation with his new little family during meal times, during a lull in the conversation, he can’t help but open up the book again to read another few pages.

“Hey, you found something new to read! I don’t recognise this one,” says Nott, wiping her mouth on the back of her sleeve.

“Yeah,” Caleb replies, glancing over at her. “I found it under my pillow earlier. You didn’t perhaps leave it there?”

Nott’s long pointed ears flap back and forth slightly as she shakes her head.

“That _is_ rather mysterious though,” she adds, scratching her chin in thought. “Do you want me and Jester to investigate it?”

“Investigating?” says Jester, her head whipping around at the mention of her name. “Are we taking on a new case? Whatever it is, Nott and I will sort it out, don’t you worry, Caleb.”

“Oh, I don’t think that’s necessary,” Caleb replies with a smile, charmed at their willingness to help. “It didn’t seem like there was any funny business and I’m sure that whoever went to such lengths to give me a book did it this way so that it wouldn’t be embarrassing for them. If it happens again and it seems like a problem, you will be the first people I tell.”

“We’d better be,” says Nott, narrowing her eyes in mock suspicion before returning to her plate of offal.

“Are you at least enjoying the book though?” asks Jester, glancing down to where his thumb is wedged between the pages, keeping his place. “Even though you got it all sneaky-like?”

“I am,” he says. “It’s really interesting and will be very useful if our adventures ever do take us to the Fey Wild.”

“Well, that’s alright then.” Jester flashes him one of her midday-sun smiles and goes back to eating her pie, turning her attention to whatever battle strategy Beau and Fjord are discussing this mealtime.

Caleb absentmindedly eats his pie while wondering if the shade of blue skin the book describes pixies as having is anything like Jester’s.

***

The next one is tucked into his bedroll and comes with a hastily scrawled note inside it.

_Sorry if the last one scared you. I probably should have left a note. This is just to help you cope while we’re travelling because you’re always complaining you don’t have enough to read._

_Allas liebe,_

_Dein freund._

_P.S. I hope my Zemnian is alright!_

Caleb glances at the cover. This time it’s what looks like a novel called ‘ _By Light of Dawn’_. He can’t wait to get started on it, having already burned through the three books he could afford to buy before leaving town three days ago. With a smile, he turns to the rest of the group.

“Whoever gave me this, your Zemnian is actually really good. Just so you know though, _‘alles’_ is spelled ‘a-l-l-e-s’. And you would capitalise _‘Liebe’_ and _‘Freund’_. But no matter. This friend of yours is really very grateful. _Danke schön._ ”

He’s met with six identical looks of confusion. Whoever his _‘Freund’_ is, is a very good actor; the book could only have come from one of them.

After a quick supper and deciding between them who would take watch that night, Caleb settles onto his bedroll and opens his new book, taking a moment to appreciate the smell of new ink and parchment that wafts from it. His eyes flutter closed a little as he drinks in the scent and when his eyes open again, Jester is sitting on her bedroll a few feet away watching him with an amused smile.

“What?” he asks, self-consciously, heat flooding his cheeks. He always feels strange when he knows Jester is watching him.

“I just don’t think I’ll ever understand how you can love books so much that even the smell of them makes you happy.”

Caleb is grateful for the dim light of their campfire because he’s sure his cheeks are blood red.

“Well, I don’t know many people who love books as much as I do to ask them, but I suppose it’s comparable to when you open up your paints or inks to draw. Doesn’t that scent fill you with an expectation of the enjoyment you’re about to have?”

“I suppose it does. And that’s what happens when you open up a book?”

“I think so, ja,” says Caleb. “It’s just one of those things that make it seem like, for a brief time anyway, that there’s nothing wrong with the world.”

“Well, _that_ I understand,” Jester replies, before yawning loudly and settling down onto her bedroll. “I suppose I should sleep if I’m taking the next watch. Goodnight, Caleb. I really hope you enjoy your book.”

“I’m sure I will,” he assures her. “Goodnight, Jester.”

He watches her for a moment as she settles down before turning back to his book. The story is as riveting as he hoped it would be, but he is thoroughly exhausted from the day’s travels in the bright sun across challenging terrain. He reads for as long as he can before conceding defeat and calling it a night. It’s just around the same time that Jester is waking up to take over the watch from Yasha. As she brushes past his bedroll and the air stirs around him, he realises that that ink-and-parchment scent now also reminds him of the girl who spends almost all of her free time writing and drawing.

***

He wakes up with the third book on his face a few days later.

“Mr Caleb, sorry to wake you,” says the deep, gentle voice of Caduceus. “Breakfast is ready and we should probably be on our way soon. Did you fall asleep reading again last night?”

“I don’t think so,” says Caleb, peeling the book away from his face, and rubbing the tender skin there. The raised lettering of the title has left behind a series of curious grooves. “Caduceus, you had the last watch – you didn’t perhaps see who placed the book there?”

“Not that I recall, no,” Caduceus replies. “It was like that that when I woke up for my watch. I assumed you fell asleep reading again. You tend to do that a lot.”

“No, you’re right of course.” Caleb flips open the cover of the book and, to his delight, finds another note. “Thanks, anyway. I will come to get breakfast as soon as I am packed.”

“Don’t be too long – the tea is getting cold and it’s really at its best when it’s hot.” Caduceus then turns and makes his way out of Caleb’s slowly fading bubble spell, while Caleb takes a good long look at his new book. The title, which he assumes is etched on his face in reverse, reads _‘The Great Houses of Tal’dorei’_ , which, while seeming a little bit dryer than the previous two books, is no doubt full of useful information.

Caleb picks up the note and reads the message.

_Sorry about the bad Zemnian in my last note. I’m trying to pick up as much of it from you as I can while we go. It’s a really lovely language._

_This one looks a little bit more boring than the others, sorry about that. But, really, that just means I am saving the better ones for later so you should thank me._

_Alles Liebe,_

_Dein Freund_

It’s physically impossible to suppress the smile that spreads across his face.

“I certainly _do_ thank you,” he says out loud, hoping to see a reaction from any of his friends, but they all appear to be getting on with their business as usual. None of them betrays any sign that they might be behind the mysterious books.

“Hey, Caleb,” says Jester, who has come back into the fading bubble wearing that look of mischievous glee that he knows means that she’s about to make a joke. “It looks like that book made quite the _impression_ on you, huh?”

She looks so pleased with herself and the pun is so truly awful, that Caleb can’t help the small laugh he lets out. Jester’s smile – if possible – grows wider.

“I take it you slept well then?” he asks.

“I always do,” she sing-songs, gathering the last of her things and setting them up on the wagon. Caleb watches her, both baffled and amused, and glances back down at his new book. He doubts Jester has ever allowed herself to feel bored for more than five minutes before finding something to amuse herself with, and he admires that about her.

He decides that this is one book he probably won’t give to her to read when he’s done.

***

Caleb continues to find books in strange places over the next few days. He finds one with his name on it in Nott’s hood while walking behind her, he finds a small bundle of shorter books underneath his folded coat one morning, and, most memorably, he even finds a tiny one tucked into one of his boots while walking one day. It definitely hadn’t been there that morning.

The books always come with a note signed the same way and though Caleb tries his hardest to root out whoever the book-planter is by thanking the whole group, so far they have been really good about not giving away their identity. Part of Caleb knows that there’s probably a reason that the person doesn’t want to be discovered and that he should probably just enjoy the books and respect their anonymity, but the more it goes on the more he finds _needs_ to know. He knows that all of the Mighty Nein care about him, but he needs to know who would care enough to go to these lengths to make him happy.

He tries his hardest not to hope for it to be the one person he hopes most it would be.

By the time they reach the next big town and can stay in the comfort of a tavern again, Caleb has formulated a plan. It might be a waste of components, but he doesn’t really care. He wants the opportunity to do something kind for the person who has been so unconditionally kind to him over this stretch of their journey.

Caleb knows that the book-planter must operate at night or some time that they think he is occupied with something else, so while they’re all enjoying a drink in the tavern below, Caleb leans over to Nott.

“If I asked you to do something kind of crazy for me, would you?”

“Anything, Caleb,” says Nott. “But, just so I know, how crazy are we talking?”

“I need you to come outside with me under the pretence that we’re having a deep conversation. I’m then going to make myself invisible and sneak up to my room to see if I can catch whoever it is that’s sending me these books.”

“Do you think that’ll work? What if they don’t plant a book tonight?”

“There’s as good a chance as any,” shrugs Caleb. “If I knew that I wasn’t going to be anywhere near my room because I was outside talking to someone else, that’s when I would do it. You’ll help?”

“Yeah,” says Nott with a bemused smile. “Just say when.”

Caleb gives it a few more minutes before faking dizziness and claiming he needs fresh air and tries not to be too pleased and guilty at how concerned Jester looks. As he fake-stumbles out of the tavern, Nott follows, informing the others that she thinks he’s in one of his anxious moods again.

“Hope you feel better, Caleb!” he hears Jester call behind him and it fills him with a strange warmth. Her concern for him always makes him melt, even though he’s sure he’s reading too much into it. She cares a great deal for all her friends.

The outside air is cold and helps him refocus his thoughts.

“Well it’s nice and pleasant out here,” says Nott, rubbing her arms.

Caleb pulls his scarf from around his neck and wraps around it his small friend.

“I appreciate this so much, Nott. I’ll try not to be too long. I just wanted to create a chance for the book-planter to do their thing.”

“It’s alright. I hope you figure it out.”

With a grateful smile to Nott, Caleb turns himself invisible and sneaks back into the tavern, up the stairs and into his room. He’s initially concerned that Frumpkin might give him away, but when he tells him to curl up on his bed, he figures there’s nothing too suspicious about a sleeping cat.

He settles on a stool in the corner of the room, trying to be as silent as possible, and waits. Five minutes pass, then ten, and just as he thinks that it might not happen, the door to his room creaks open an in sneaks Jester. She looks nervous and actually jumps a little when Frumpkin stretches in his sleep.

“Oh, Frumpkin, it’s just you,” she laughs, plopping down on the bed next to him and scratching him behind his ears. “I’m just here to drop off a book for Caleb. You won’t tell him, will you?”

Frumpkin lets out a small non-committal _‘prrow’_ in response and Jester sighs.

“It’s not that I don’t want him to know that they’re from me, it’s just that I don’t know how easy it’ll be for me to hide how I really feel about him when he knows. It would be so embarrassing because I don’t think he sees me like that, you know? That time we danced was so lovely, but it turned out he was thinking of his old girlfriend and I just don’t know if he’s ready for anything. I guess I really don’t want him to think I’m just a silly girl with a crush on him.”

Caleb’s heart, already beating furiously at the confirmation of his hopes, stops for a moment at this new information. Jester, the person at the forefront of his mind at most points throughout the day, has a crush on him. And _she’s_ worried that _he_ won’t like her back. It’s laughable, and though he knows it will be one of the most reckless things he ever does, he knows he has to disprove her fears.

He watches as she slips the book under the pillow, gives Frumpkin one last scratch and leaves the room.

By the time he’s back in the tavern, watching Jester laugh so hard she snorts at a joke Nott tells, his plan is fully formed.

***

A few nights later, when they’re back out on the open road, Caleb watches eagerly as Jester unrolls her bedroll to reveal a book.

The day before they left, Caleb found the nearest book shop and in an attempt to find the most romantic book they stocked, came away with one called “Why the River Cries”.

Jester stares at it in surprise now, as if trying to work out if it’s even real. He watches as she opens it with trembling hands, revealing the small note Caleb put there.

_Jester_

_I thought after these past few weeks of looking out for me and making sure that I have enough to read, I should return the favour._

_I haven’t read this one yet, so I’m sorry if it’s terrible. I hope that if it’s not good, that it’s at least funny because I really love it when you laugh._

_Or if it’s not funny, I hope it gives you an excuse to have a good cry. Speaking as a friend, you don’t let yourself have those enough._

_Though I can’t promise you much, I can promise you that I would never think of you as a silly girl with a crush. It would be really hypocritical of me as a silly wizard who’s in love with a beautiful cleric woman who’s probably far too good for him._

_Mit Liebe,_

_Dein Freund_

Her eyes scan the note, widening more and more as she reads. She stares at the page for what feels like an eternity to Caleb, but eventually, she looks up from the note and their eyes lock. Caleb’s heart races as Jester strides towards him.

“You really mean this?” she says.

“It’s not the kind of thing I would joke about.” As soon as she’s close enough, he takes her hands in his. “I can’t tell you how happy I was to find out that you were the one giving me the books and how even more overjoyed I was to find out why. Everything I wrote in that note is completely true. And if you’d have me, as terrified I am of saying this right now because I’m sure it’s going to wake me up from this dream, I’d love to be yours.”

“We shouldn’t do this in front of everyone right now, not until we have a chance to have a good talk about this, but I can’t wait,” she says before pressing her lips to his. The kiss is short because of the risk of being seen by their friends, but it’s sweet and full of the promise of more. Caleb feels as though he’s floating on air. She settles down next to him on his bedroll and though they dare not do more with everyone watching, it’s lovely sitting with their knees touching without worrying that Jester can feel his feelings for her through the contact.

When Fjord asks who’d like to take first watch, Jester immediately volunteers and nudges Caleb to put his hand up too. Caleb is sure he falls more in love with her as they quietly discuss the books they’ve shared while waiting for the rest of the Nein to fall asleep. And once they’re sure that there’s no one awake, Caleb sits behind Jester, pulling her close to his chest and resting his chin on her head as they watch the night surrounding them. As he lets out a sigh of contentment, he reflects on how it’s quite possible he’s never loved books as much as he does right now.

 

 

 

 


End file.
